Desperate Measures
by LadyAshh
Summary: Prompt: "Kate is trying to get pregnant and can't because she is underweight from all the stress in her life."


**A/N: Prompt: "Kate is trying to get pregnant and can't because she is underweight from all the stress in her life." I had planned this differently, but it came out this way … I hope this works **

* * *

She lay across Castle nude's body, lightly tracing her fingers over his chest, staring up at him. They had passed out after their third round last night. It was still dark when she woke up, the only light was the stream of moonlight that bathed their room in a slow glow.

She looked up at him, knowing he wouldn't wake up any time soon and since he was always staring at her while she slept, she would take this opportunity to return to favour. She drew her hands underneath her chin and she stared up at him.

He was sound asleep, the laugh lines and wrinkles on his face temporarily smoothed out, his nostrils flared with every breath he took and his lips parted, snoring lightly, although he would never admit to snoring when Kate told him about it. His bare chest toned a bit more now than it used to be, this was probably due to her forcing him to do yoga with her, or go jogging at 'the crack of Satan's ass' as he like to call it. But he did it all for her, anything for her.

Especially in these past months since they had gotten married, she was ready to try with him, not knowing how much she really wanted children until her period came every time. She didn't imagine she would ever turn into that person that scheduled when she would be ovulating and then get Castle into bed with her, but she did, because she wanted this so badly, more than she ever knew she did.

He knew that and he wanted this too, not that he ever had a problem with Beckett wanting to have sex so often since she decided to try. It just made them find more ways to be creative and keep it interesting and that they did.

A smile bloomed across her face as she remembered last night and she just knew this time was the right time and she would get lucky this time. She had to.

He begun stirring underneath her and she turned her attention back to him. He looked down at her with those sleepy, satisfied blue eyes and smiled.

"Hey." He breathed.

"Hey." She smiled, pressing a kiss to his chest.

"Last night was amazing." He grinned, running his fingers through her hair.

She closed her eyes and let herself be comforted by the soothing feeling of Castle's hand in her hair, "Yea, it was. There's no way you didn't get me pregnant."

She opened her eyes when he didn't respond and she was met with his rapidly darkening eyes and then he was pulling her up his body, pressing a bruising kiss to her lips, which she responded to immediately, running her hands over his chest before finding their home, tangled in his hair.

"Well," He said against her lips, "Just to be sure."

Before she knew it, he was hovering over her and entering her in one swift move. Her mouth fell open and her eyes shut at the feel of him inside her and yes, it couldn't hurt just to be sure.

* * *

Weeks later, lying in bed with Castle after an exhausting night of laser tag, - she beat him of course – she felt the familiar feeling of pain in her belly that woke her out of her sleep and had her stumbling to the bathroom in the dark.

Castle was brought out of his sleep by the cries that she was trying to contain, but apparently couldn't. He sat up in bed, noticed the light under the bathroom door and was out of bed and running over to the door immediately, pulling it open.

She was slumped on the floor, beside the toilet, her body shaking violently with sobs. He came over to her and sunk down to the floor, pulling her into his lap. She came immediately, clutching his shirt in her fists, crying into his shirt.

He didn't ask, he just held her while she cried and shook in his arms. He didn't know what had her crying on the bathroom floor at 2 in the morning, but he knew it had to be big, she never cried like this.

She cried for another half hour before weakly pulling away from him, wiping her face with her sleeve and looking up to him, with those big, sad, brown eyes.

"Honey what's wrong?" He asked her, running his hands up and down her back.

She shook her head, "I'm sorry." She whispered.

Now he was really worried, "Sorry for what?"

She didn't answer.

"Kate, sorry for what? You're scaring me."

"I'm not pregnant." She mumbled, "I got my period."

Oh Kate.

He pulled her tightly to him, "Oh Kate, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." He spoke into her hair when she began crying again.

"Why isn't this working Castle? Why can't I get pregnant?" She sobbed.

"I don't know honey, I'm so sorry." He repeated.

His heart broke when she told him, more for her than for himself. She had wanted this so badly for months and each time she would only be devastated when her period came. Surely, something was wrong here.

"I think we should go see a doctor." He heard himself say.

She raised her head from his chest, "Why? Do you think something is wrong with me?" She asked, "Oh God Castle, what if something is wrong with me and I can't ever give you kids?" She cried again.

"Sssshh, Kate, let's just go and see and we'll work from there okay?" He kissed her hair, "And Kate, I'll still love you, kids or no kids, I didn't marry you because I wanted more kids, I married you because I love you and will always love you okay?"

She drew in a shaky breath and nodded, allowing Castle to pull her up from the floor. He got her dressed and walked her out the door and into the car, driving off to the doctor's office. She was on autopilot, not really in control of what was happening to her. The devastation had numbed her, she just let Castle take over.

In no time she was sitting on a reclining chair, waiting for a doctor. Castle sat by her side, holding her hand tightly, placing kisses on her hand or her forehead every now and then.

The doctor entered the room shortly, Kate had no idea what she looked like, just stared blankly at the ceiling, until her vision became blurred, then she would raise her hand to wipe it away.

She heard them talking, but she wasn't listening, didn't know what they were saying. All she could think about were the dreams she once had, of being pregnant, of little Castle/Beckett's running around, which were now dead because clearly something was wrong with her and she couldn't have children. Now, she didn't even want to know what was wrong with her, then it made it official.

The doctor examined Kate quickly, before she had the chance for Kate to feel uncomfortable and then left the room, leaving her and Castle alone again.

He didn't speak and neither did she. He didn't know what to say, for once in his life, he was speechless when he didn't want to be. He was just as worried as she was and settled for holding her hand, letting her know he was here and he would always be.

The silence in the room was heavy and would have been uncomfortable if she wasn't so caught up in her mind. If she wasn't so caught up in her own thoughts, she would have seen Castle bow his head, would have felt his tears on her hand.

The doctor came back with a smile on her face and it disturbed Kate. She was devastated and this woman was smiling with them? Once again she heard nothing, but then Castle was sighing in relief beside her and kissing her.

She focused on his face, asked him what the doctor said. He looked at her strangely, but she didn't care, she just wanted to know.

Underweight, he said.

She couldn't get pregnant because she was underweight and stressing about not being able to have a baby.

She could laugh, but she didn't, because she was still devastated, but at least now she knew there was something she could do about it.

And that she did.

She had never been one to eat the required amount of food today and got by on take out, coffee and whatever treat Castle would bring for her.

To Castle amusement, she was up every morning, preparing a large meal with bacon, eggs, pancakes, fruits and more. Castle was pleased he didn't have to force her to eat at least one meal a day anymore, she found a reason to.

She was eating three meals a day, even more, determined to gain the weight and drop the stress. She was apparently too underweight for a woman her age and her body just didn't have enough resources to be able to carry a child.

They were in the middle of a case now and were discussing the victim's financials over a large box of pizza (extra cheese per Kate's request) the boys didn't know of their situation, so naturally when Kate had more than one slice of pizza, they began to share glances.

For the time being, they ignored it, but four slices later, when she was asking if anyone was gonna eat the last slice and grabbing without waiting for anyone to answer, they looked to Castle, a grin on each of their faces.

She had been gaining weight and eating an increased amount of food, she was pregnant!

But no, she was still drinking coffee, then again it could be decaf. Yep, Beckett was definitely pregnant.

Castle could tell just what was on their minds by the stupid grins on their face and he would let them think what they wanted, they wouldn't be wrong soon enough.

It had been a month since their failed attempt and she had managed to gain a good amount of weight. Nothing else was wrong with her according to the doctor and she felt confident enough to try again, to which Castle, of course, had no complaints.

So try they did, five times, fuelled by a certain red wine and the need to reproduce. They lasted until the wee hours of the morning before falling asleep in a mess of tangled limbs as usual.

"How you feeling?" He asked when they woke up the next morning, cuddling together under the covers.

She smiled, tugging his arm around her more, "Pretty good." She responded.

"You think we did it?" He dared to ask.

She was silent for a moment and he opened his mouth to speak, scared that he put bad thoughts into her head about this whole thing.

"I think we did." She said, kissing his knuckles.

He smiled, "Well now, we wait."

She nodded, "Now we wait."

* * *

They didn't have to wait long, shortly after, she found herself once again crying on the bathroom floor with Castle's arms wrapped around her, but this time for a different reason.

Instead of the sign of a failed attempt, they cried tears of joy on the positive sign on all three pregnancy tests she bought.

They had done it. She had done it.

Nothing could keep Kate Beckett from achieving what she wanted. It was a good thing she got used to eating like a regular person for the past month, because now she would have to start eating like a pregnant person.

Absolutely nothing made her happier than this, well except for Castle.

She turned to him and pounced at him, pushing him backwards onto the floor, showering his face with kisses, before planting a hard kiss to his lips.

"We're having a baby." She grinned.

"We're having a baby."


End file.
